I’m a manager in an Human Resources department for a large company.Back in December a new employee started in our office. Another employee, “Mika,” got obessed with Nina’s hair. Mika’s hair was a single length and almost down to her stomach.If you have a ton of standing (i.e., you’re in demand and they’re thrilled to be working with you), you could just say, “Oh, I don’t do video chat — sorry!” If you have less standing, you might be better off referencing, uh, a software or other issue that has messed with your computer camera.I typically keep a piece of paper taped over my laptop camera to avoid accidental video sharing. Am I obligated to participate in the video chats and give up my at-home comfortable style?An increasing number of offices do use video chat, so yeah, I’d say it’s fairly normal — or at least not abnormal.But in general, the more in-demand you are, the more ability you have to say “no, I don’t do that” (the same thing with showing up for all meetings in a hoodie or only being reachable from 3-4 and only on Tuesdays, or whatever). Open-toed shoes at job interviews Most standards of professional dress are somewhat arbitrary; they’re conventions because they’ve become conventions, not necessarily because there’s any inherent logic to them.(Why are skirts okay but shorts of the same length aren’t?
Several of her colleagues have told me Mika’s random crying and oversharing of her marital issues are making them uncomfortable.Mika decided to get it and even went to Nina’s salon to get it done. She has cried over it while at work and this makes everyone uncomfortable.She said she has spent hundreds on vitamins to make her hair grow faster, and she is also getting into more personal territory because she has been telling everyone about how her husband is upset that she spent the money they were saving for a vacation on an expensive wig without telling him.However, at this point continuing to talk about it in the office is becoming disruptive, and I’m sure you can understand it’s making things particularly uncomfortable for Nina.Going forward, I’d like you to keep conversations about your haircut out of the office.