Like most Hasidic Jews (we both became religious later in life), our dating period lasted a very short time. I mean, how you can feel that burning love when you’re sitting at the table discussing how to use the last twenty dollars in your bank account? How can you feel it when you think it makes perfect sense to put your socks on the floor after you’re done with them, and she has this crazy idea that they need to go in the laundry basket? And now, as I’m a bit older and a bit more experienced with this relationship, I’ve finally come to realize something. There was no way I could keep that dating fire burning as practicality invaded our lives. Something I haven’t wanted to admit for a long time, but is undeniable.
We have our list of family rules taped to the refrigerator. If you are new here, be sure to subscribe by email or feed reader so that you don't miss any future posts.You can also check out the Top Posts page to get a feel for the site. Every home should have its own set of family rules."Our 14 year old keeps sneaking out in the middle of the night. She says she sorry..she can't be that sorry if she keeps doing it. We've told her it is a safety issue more than anything else." You and your husband need to have a series of sit-down discussions with her.What needs to happen is that you end up with an agreement whereby she agrees she will not sneak out and you will allow some dating or other privilege.
And even worse, it seemed that the harder I tried to be sentimental and lovey-dovey, the less it was reciprocated. Or, once we had a daughter, when I shared the responsibility of watching over her. Because as our marriage progressed, I found myself offering to help out around the house more and more. It took me longer than I care to admit to understand what was happening. Through giving, through doing things for my wife, the emotion that I had been so desperately seeking naturally came about. An emotion that, once had, somehow magically stays within a marriage forever. And I’m saddened to think about how much those messages bounced around in my head for so long.